Mediumship - Not An Exact Science

Tuesday May 12 2015

I was recently trying to explain how I read and thought it was worth sharing especially when coming from a position of the expectation that all mediums are 100% correct, as seemed to be the expectation by some people on free reading threads on Facebook! Mind you it’s hard enough explaining it to a believer let alone a sceptic, which this person is! Not everybody reads in the same way, our spiritual connections are unique to us. 

I personally tend to take a rather pragmatic approach, it’s a science not a God given gift and is all about the electrochemistry of the brain and remembering that the “soul” of a person is their mind; that is electrical energy too and unique to the individual. A brain transplant may be possible one day – a mind transplant won’t because the energy (electromagnetic energy of the brain) is created by the individual who is created genetically and environmentally and not only spiritually.  The part that we connect with after death is this part that "thinks and feels" the mind. This does not mean that the connection between man and spirit is not something to be respected and revered: it is. The “beings” are there for us, but the actual art of connection and being able to read doesn’t make you a demi-God or even half a demi-God!

Mediumship is the linking of the “dead mind” and the "live mind” (the medium). To communicate the two energies have to be constant and of course they aren’t always. If a medium is getting a message that should say, “That is a really pretty dress with flowers on it” the medium may only hear “That pretty flower.” No one knows how to maintain constant contact and in my experience it’s not possible. This is why some people can read and some can’t. Some people “see ghosts” because for that split second or few moments the frequency matches and some don’t ever get to that moment in time when it all aligns energetically. Most non medium people, or should I say people who don’t consider themselves in tune, see or hear things at night because of a lack of artificial energy (lights, etc) there is less interference and thus less effort is required.

When I read, I “feel” as well, I then translate the feeling. For example; The big tall man I feel around a client, I can “feel” he is tall and was possibly a drinker. Once that connection is made it gets stronger and you can build more but you have to interpret the feelings because there are no words; the communication is silent if you like. Maybe there are two spirits there and we have to identify one. Once we have acknowledged someone in spirit we can connect more easily the second time around because the energy signature is already identified. It’s like remembering someone’s name or face after you met them for the first time.

However, being a medium we are not in your personal life or your reality so if I say “Big tall man” that could be anyone in the world, so I go on for validation and progress from there, it’s like building a puzzle and not always a fluid conversation. I “see” people in spirit who are married as they hold hands, bad marriage they stand together but no touching, separated then a prominent gap between them. It’s not like I just have a running dialogue or they come right out and say “We were married but hated each other” “We were happily married” etc. Some mediums hear, I do now and again but rarely out loud, usually it’s like a thought is dropped into your head and you hear that thought. People can communicate the same way – have you ever found yourself thinking of someone at a random moment and for no reason, this can be because the energy is transferring and they are thinking of you too, or you will see them soon. It’s a mild form of energy exchange. In the same way a medium can “think” of someone they don’t know and connect because the energetic connection is there.

Because mediums have rarely any private knowledge of the client they have to place what they see and interpret what they hear to fit within the reality of the client and not their won – so if a medium uses a bog standard phrase “Mary Poppins” type it is probably the phrase they use for someone who cared for kids, or who was busy, kind hearted and officious. It’s not a fall back it’s a staple to get the message across.

I don’t shut down and have spooks wandering in and out on and off. If you have kept up with my Facebook page you will know about Jerry and perhaps you will laugh,  but I don’t know him, he is only connected to me because he was in the house I lived in and in no other way part of my life.

Imagine you go into a shopping centre and there are hundreds of people around you but you aren’t connected to any of them. It’s the same with spooks, if they can get in they will, it is up to the medium to filter what they are receiving and that is part of what makes a medium good. So you don’t necessarily get it wrong if you can’t place someone, it’s more like your radar is wandering or wavering. Usually if there is an emotional connection with the client and their spook the medium will mostly get their client spirit loved ones because the connection and the need to be heard is stronger. I have given messages to people for their friends during readings because it is like the spook sees the phone line is open and talks and take a chance!

If three different people you know described you to a complete stranger and then put you in a line up, would you get picked from the three separate descriptions? Probably not, so the medium has to get enough to positively and individually identify someone and that can take time and effort but usually starts with a general phrase. Trust me, reading for an hour does your head in sometimes because there is a constant effort to keep the connection and the mind state you are in to do that. Some people are natural, they are wired right; some people are more psychic than mediumistic (no spirit people just feelings) and some mix both.

It is not yet possibly to scientifically test mediumship so the only way we can be in any way assured of genuine ability is by a relatively high accuracy strike rate and even then we all have our days when we just don’t got it. We are after all, only human!

Making Amends & Saving A Life

Thursday May 7, 2015 (It's been too long I know!)

Too many times we use spirit in readings to find out about us. Where is life going? Who is the man of my dreams. Here I want to tell you a couple of true stories about the more profound and possibly one of the real uses of spirit in our lives. If you have read my book, you will know the background, which we won’t go into here but these situations happened recently, post book.

Barry Gray and I were doing some on camera training for the new show. The only reading guinea pig available was little old me and you could hear them skeletons rattling in the closet almost immediately. We were only doing mediumship and working on the identification of spirits around others. Barry went gangbusters with the first few, and I was confident he had it all going on until he said he had an old man standing back who wanted to come in but wasn’t sure if he could. Flippantly I said bring him through, for a split second wished as he described him I wished he hadn’t but now I am so glad he did.

This man was a part of my life as a child and without a word of a lie, evil personified. I knew we were training and this was a professional environment so I couldn’t really react the way I wanted to as Barry spoke.  I white knuckled my way through it. I know for sure when we go over we have to review our lives and feel what we did to others good and bad and this man had clearly taken a fast track to purgatory after dropping dead in his own hallway thirty years or so ago. As a medium I knew how he felt and a few times he had come to me and I had ignored it and sent him away. He had no place in my thoughts, my memories and thank God, my life any more. Due to the situation I allowed him to speak through Barry. It wasn’t tearful or emotional, I was stoic, “Say what you have to say and get lost” was in my head. The more Barry went on the more understanding I had of this man and the things he did. He negatively affected generations of the family and it had all come home to roost. There were no heartfelt apologies though, it wasn’t like a tearful reunion at the airport with a long lost and loved relative; more a rather humble explanation of who he was in life, why he was in life and how death and the other side had treated him. Something went off in my head and I realised despite the damage, this man had also suffered (no excuse) and to an extent was continuing to because no one still living would forgive him. It was almost as if he was or is destined to wander the ethereal plane until someone found it in their heart to let him off the hook. The accuracies that Barry bought through were profound, undeniable and rang true without ambiguity.

I felt a weight lifting from me, and it stays away to this day as I now realise it really isn’t up to us to judge or to carry hatred and spite, the Universe takes care of that. Two nights later I heard the familiar wheeze and hack of the same spirit-man and a vague, emphysema soaked “thank you.” Instead I say thank you to him, because that connection and conversation seems to have released us both from a potential lifetime of negativity. We can still learn in spirit as we can in the human realm.

On another sad but turns happier note. I wanted Barry to read for a friend of mine. I won’t mince words, this friend was at risk of suicide and life seemed blacker than black with no way back for him and I was scared. I didn’t want to lose my friend and became a little neurotic about it. I wasn’t there when the reading happened but clearly Barry gave my friend enough validations and then enough hope for me to now have a much happier and more positive friend back and I love it. Did Barry and spirit save a life? Yes I know so and I thank them both for it.